struggles

I've been struggling with my applications as of late. I think I had some pretty unrealistic views as to how much time this would entail... anyhow, that's all I've been doing for days now. I'm hoping to be finished by Friday, but Monday is probably more realistic at this point. Well, that is, if finishing at all is to be considered "realistic."

Over mint-whiskey cocktails Claire and I had a heart-to-heart tonight. I won't go too much into detail, but suffice to say we had some interesting discussions regarding mental health. How much is chosen by ourselves, as in, do we choose the mental state we are in?

I've also been doing a lot of reading on medical iatrogenesis and medicalisation. There is this philosopher/ex-Catholic priest, Ivan Illich, who has written a lot on this. In fact, he coined the term iatrogenesis which is the clinically irrelevant or damaging treatments administered by physicians which cause patients, who were not actually sick, to be sick. It really makes you think... is it possible that in our search for health doctors are making us sick?
In other articles, I've been reading about how biopsies can cause cancer to metastasize. I remember I heard this program once on CBC about how cancer could be found in just about anyone if we look hard enough. All cancer really is is abnormal cells. Our bodies try to cordon off these cancerous cells by sectioning them away into tumors, which are often benign, but then we poke and prod and *presto* you have cancer. I'm aware that this may sound kind of cynical, but I don't mean it to sound as such, it's just got me thinking that's all.

I guess I should go to bed. I thought that by writing this out I might gain some perspective.

In other news, my visa for India is ready for pick up. I guess I'll go back to Ottawa on Saturday to collect it.

Oh, and I get to meet Layla's extended family tomorrow!! I am very very excited to meet them all! I hope they like enchiladas!